Written By: Jeronimus
I’ve noticed this pattern all my life. Mom, the woman in your life, will tend to throw cold water on the plans of a boy or a man to go on adventures and accomplish things.
A lot of moms are happy with their sons in the living room playing video games when they’re forty years old. This is unspeakably tragic.
The fathers role however is to train his sons to go out into the world, have adventures, and accomplish things.
Father makes plans to accomplish things. Mom tries to throw cold water on this. Mom argues for stasis, impassivity, and just doing the minimum to live. Dad instinctively knows that the status quo is inadequate, and we must strive for higher, better, stronger, and more.
If the boy tries to accomplish something and fails, then Mom gets to make her case for staying at home and doing nothing.
Failing at a venture however, is no vice. One must fail many times in order to succeed. Failure is not a precursor for quitting, it is merely a learning experience.
This is why it is so important to teach competence in young men from an early age. The five-year-old should be building things out of blocks, and the seven year old should be snapping together plastic models, and then working with balsa wood models. By about ten years of age a boy is ready to construct electronic circuits, and do woodworking.
Suppose dad dies when the boy is twelve, and Mom wants to keep him home in the living room playing video games for the rest of his life.
If Dad had been training him to be competent in his formative years, he would be far less likely to listen to Mom. When he goes out in the world he will experience some sweet success to display as a trophy, while putting a brave face on any failure.
A father must install multiple weapon systems in his sons from a young age: Fighting, technical ability, trades, athletic prowess, charisma, manly dance moves, and most importantly; emotional self-regulation.
Life is all about tilting the odds as much as possible in your favor. Raising your sons to be highly competent tilts the odds in their favor as much as possible. Remember what the stakes are.